Becoming Self Reliant and Adjusting to Missionary Life

Before I even came on my mission I always talked with my mom about being on your own. She explained to me that it was like a baby bird being kicked out of the the nest and learning how to fly. I understood what that meant, but like many things you have to have on the job training to know what it is like. Once I came out on my mission I truly felt felt what it was like to be kicked out of the nest and trying to fly to the best of my ability. It doesn't help that I am a bit of a perfectionist and so I felt like people expected me to sour when I was only able to struggle flapping my wings. I had many things that I had to learn about an deal with. Those things that I had to deal with was budgeting, home sickness, dealing with other people, exercise, work, teaching, studying, and many others that I learned and are continuing to learn. Before my mission I didn't know what anxiety, depression, or major stress felt like. I think that the Lord gave me those weaknesses on my mission so I could learn how to deal with them and grow much more than if I didn't develop them.

In the past eighteen years I have grown really close to my two wonderful parents and my six younger siblings. I loved to be with them and enjoyed doing family activities with them through the years. When I went on my mission the home sickness didn't really sink in until three and a half months into my mission. I was really depressed and I wanted to go home. It didn't help that I was also struggling with my companion at the time. However I also wanted to stay on my mission and serve. I felt like I would need to go into counseling so I called my Mission President and he gave me some great advice. He said that I should pray to Heavenly Father and that He through the Savior would help me with my home sickness. It took a little bit of time, but I soon had peace and comfort about staying on my mission. My Mission President gave me some wonderful advice to me about becoming self reliant. He said this;

"You don't become a man (or woman) until you learn to let go of your family and strive to be on your own and start a family of your own. I don't think you want to live with your parents for the rest of your life in their basement do you? I would advise you to go to your Heavenly Father and ask for peace and comfort to let go of your family."

-President Swain

The advice from him helped me greatly. The reason why the Savior helped me through this was because he suffered not only for our pains and suffering, but also depression we feel, sadness, loneliness, and anxiety that we are going through as well. I will be forever grateful for Jesus Christ and for the peace and comfort he has given me.

The past eighteen years was preparing me to be off on my own and to learn from experience and on the job training. Now I have been out for over eighteen months and I have grown quite a lot. I have learned how to be off on my own and deal with anxiety that I get from time to time. I have let go of my family and don't get homesick any more. I am still learning and growing, but there is one thing that I have learned through a lot of what I have gone through. It is relying on the Savior and and putting our faith and trust in Him and know that he will make things right or make it for our benefit meaning that we will still go through trials, but we will be able to deal with them and handle them much better than if we went through it alone, not wanting the Savior's help that he so readily is will to give to us.